While We're Yammering About T.V.

So I watched Who Wants to be a Superhero last week. Wow. It's every bit as bad seeing that in print as it is simply hearing it reverberate in my head.

A reality show hosted by Stan Lee that will allow ordinary people to gain immortality in the pages of a Stan Lee comic book. I suppose there are worse things. Than the premise, that is. Watching the show itself was pretty high up on the list of those proverbial "worse things".

Frankly, I'd seen a commercial or two and had fully intended to skip it entirely. My daughters, however, were sucked right in. Insisting, all the way, that I had to watch it with them. You know you love your kids when you agree to watch crappy reality tv (except American Idol, of course, that's completely different - LOL!) with them.

I sat through the entire episode, including the footage of early auditions (where Stan was treated to one young lady whose superpower was stopping villains in their tracks by removing her top, which she eagerly demonstrated) until the teary-eyed (and no my eyes weren't the ones tearing, though I badly wanted to gouge them out) elimination round where the young Nitro G was sent to the trash can to discard his superhero costume. Oh, the humiliation. Then again, the whole thing was.

The remaining contestants include an overweight single mother of three, a bodyguard, a disc jockey, and a devout vegan, among others. According to information on the site,

Each contestant begins with an original idea for a superhero, a self-made costume, and their best superhero mojo. From thousands of hopefuls, Stan Lee chooses 11 lucky finalists who move together into a secret lair. There they will begin their transformations — and their competition for the opportunity to become real-life superheroes. Over the course of the series, they will test their mettle, try to overcome their limitations, and do what it takes to prove that they truly are super.

The finalists will leave their former lives behind and become their brainchild heroes, all under Stan Lee's watchful eye. Each week, our aspiring heroes will be challenged with competitions designed to test their true natures. No one will be asked to perform feats of impossible strength; our superheroes will be tested for courage, integrity, self-sacrifice, compassion, and resourcefulness — all traits that every true superhero must possess.

The prize for being the last man/woman standing is a comic book featuring their character, penned by Lee, and the character will appear in an original SciFi channel movie. No mention of royalties or other cash payment, but you have to imagine there's something.

Last week, contestants were instructed to change into their costumes at a public park and then race to a pre-determined finish line. Ever crafty, Mr. Lee had positioned a young girl, lost and crying for her mother, near the finish line. It was pitiful to see 8 of 12 contestants run right on by and never stop to help.

Frankly, he should have eliminated every one of them. What kind of superhero isn't attentive to distress cries? Come on!! Alas, in the end, only one was eliminated, making this thing drag on far longer than it should! It's possible we've already passed that mark anyway, even in a six episode series!


Frankly, give this guy a cape and a mask and he's right in there. We could call him...I don't know...how about

Panty Shield Lad!

He'll mop up this city's grime! Changing his costume is gonna hurt like a bitch, though! Owwee!!