Random House
A few 'Random Things' from the last few days at my house. I'm gonna go bake some cookies in a few minutes, but had a few things I wanted to share. Nothing worthy of a post in itself (well, some of them I could have gone on about for days, but won't), but a few blurbs to get 'em out of my system.
* A Curt update of sorts. My kids came home yesterday. Bearing the latest tales of their youngest uncle. His mother fell at WalMart a couple weeks ago and on the day she was released from the hospital (and returned to her nursing home facility), Curt felt it was an opportunity he couldn't pass on. He tried to use her injury as an excuse to "visit" her after hours. Unfortunately, for Curt, the doors accessing the corridors to the guest rooms automatically lock after visiting hours end. Not to be outdone, he made a scene bullying the nurses and other staff (who are all abundantly familiar with Curt and his antics) until he was finally able to get to see his aunt (his mother's sister), who is also a resident at this nursing home facility. His attempts to get money from her were met with a big "get out!". And so ends another tale of Curt.
* Many moons ago, I mentioned to Highlander that I thought, given his loving nature, that he would make a great dad someday, he scoffed...repeatedly, in fact...and disagreed vehemently. After ten months around my kids, I would like to say a big "I told you so" in public. I often wish I were younger, or that it wouldn't be such a risk, because I would greatly love to give this man a child of his own. But, that is just not to be. Which is sad. Because to see him with my girls brings such a smile to my face.
Right now, he's trying to get my youngest to lie down and rest a little. She had a rough night. Waking up around 5AM with fever spiking at about 102. She hadn't been feeling poorly on Saturday. (Though they just came back from their dad's around noon and I'm not sure how she's been the last few days.) But she woke up feeling bad and with a cough. I got up with her. Gave her some meds for the cough and the fever and sat on the couch holding her, both of us trying to catnap a little. Highlander got up with us, too. Helping fetch a cool damp cloth for me to wipe on her, tissues so she could blow her nose, the thermometer.
Back in the day, I would have handled all of those things, while her father slept. Highlander was adamant in his refusal to go back to bed when I told him (more than once) that we were okay. And when my little one was ready to sleep, I laid down with her and we slept for a couple hours. I could hear Highlander in the next room, typing. Not sleeping in case we needed him. He came to check on us around 7:30. I heard his footsteps and knew what he was doing. Checking on his girls. Making sure we were okay. Worried, I suppose. I don't know if any of you realize what that means to me. What a wonderful feeling it is to know that he loves those kids as if they were his own. For this (and so many other things), let me reiterate...
Luckiest. Girl. In. The. World!
* My middle daughter had her first session with a new therapist this past week. She's been having a great deal of stress lately. Struggling a bit with school. Primarily with grades, but also with some boys who have been making her feel uncomfortable about her body. My 15 year old is quite buxom. Far more than her older sister or I, in fact. And high school boys, if you can believe it, put on impromptu contests to guess her bra size, or make remarks that embarass her, or hit on her...alot. And she knows that these are guys that have no interest in her other than the conquest. I'll give her this much, she's pretty smart. I wish this stuff didn't bother her so much, but I've never been in that position myself, so I'm not sure how I'd feel if it were me.
The other big stresser in her life right now is her dad. She and her older sister have asked me to make changes to the visitation schedule. Changes that would have them here full time (can you say 'hooray' with me?) and visiting their dad every other weekend (which is pissing him off big time). My older girls are of the age that they can pretty much make their own decision on the matter. They've been kind to him about it. The change wanted as much because they are just plain tired of packing and moving every two weeks, as they are of his anger management problems. Irrational outbursts and the verbal and emotional abuse and intimidation that have gotten better over the last year, but haven't stopped. And issues with respecting them, and their privacy, and mutual trust.
In any event, my #2 kid went for her first session last week. Her dad took her. And sat in on the session. While explaining the things stressing her, my daughter told the counselor (and her dad) that it hurt her feelings and that she was angry that he was opting to fight them on this. And when she looked him in the face and asked him why he was putting her through this, making the stress that was causing her to need a therapist, his response was that he loved her and wanted to spend more time with her. All about him. Doesn't want to lose the control or admit that he has problems or is, in any way, less of a parent than I am. Hey, don't want to think about the kids and what's best for them, huh? What a guy.
The next few months should be pretty painful for all of us, as he insists he is going to fight them on it. He knows this is coming and didn't even respect them enough to talk to them at all about it over the last two weeks while they were all together. Their feelings and opinions, obviously, mean so little to him that it wasn't worth the effort. But, I may need to subpoena the counselor. I can't believe my ex doesn't see the damage (both to the girls emotional health, but also to his long-term relationship with them) and that he is so blithe to it that he flaunts it in public with such disregard.
* Do you know the Debbie Reynolds' "Tammy" movies from the 1960's? Probably not. They're pretty stinky. But my mom loved them and that's where she got my name. In addition to the movies, there is also a theme song. Which is also pretty stinky, but I can't help it, whenever I hear it, I have to sing along. My girls mentioned to me last night that their dad has burned a mix cd that has the song on it. And that he and my youngest daughter sing along to it in the car. And that, in fact, his new girlfriend does, too. Sorry. That just freaks me out a little. Almost as much as him dating a girl named Tammy a few months ago.
Okay, off to the kitchen for me. Another fleeting Sunday, indeed!
* A Curt update of sorts. My kids came home yesterday. Bearing the latest tales of their youngest uncle. His mother fell at WalMart a couple weeks ago and on the day she was released from the hospital (and returned to her nursing home facility), Curt felt it was an opportunity he couldn't pass on. He tried to use her injury as an excuse to "visit" her after hours. Unfortunately, for Curt, the doors accessing the corridors to the guest rooms automatically lock after visiting hours end. Not to be outdone, he made a scene bullying the nurses and other staff (who are all abundantly familiar with Curt and his antics) until he was finally able to get to see his aunt (his mother's sister), who is also a resident at this nursing home facility. His attempts to get money from her were met with a big "get out!". And so ends another tale of Curt.
* Many moons ago, I mentioned to Highlander that I thought, given his loving nature, that he would make a great dad someday, he scoffed...repeatedly, in fact...and disagreed vehemently. After ten months around my kids, I would like to say a big "I told you so" in public. I often wish I were younger, or that it wouldn't be such a risk, because I would greatly love to give this man a child of his own. But, that is just not to be. Which is sad. Because to see him with my girls brings such a smile to my face.
Right now, he's trying to get my youngest to lie down and rest a little. She had a rough night. Waking up around 5AM with fever spiking at about 102. She hadn't been feeling poorly on Saturday. (Though they just came back from their dad's around noon and I'm not sure how she's been the last few days.) But she woke up feeling bad and with a cough. I got up with her. Gave her some meds for the cough and the fever and sat on the couch holding her, both of us trying to catnap a little. Highlander got up with us, too. Helping fetch a cool damp cloth for me to wipe on her, tissues so she could blow her nose, the thermometer.
Back in the day, I would have handled all of those things, while her father slept. Highlander was adamant in his refusal to go back to bed when I told him (more than once) that we were okay. And when my little one was ready to sleep, I laid down with her and we slept for a couple hours. I could hear Highlander in the next room, typing. Not sleeping in case we needed him. He came to check on us around 7:30. I heard his footsteps and knew what he was doing. Checking on his girls. Making sure we were okay. Worried, I suppose. I don't know if any of you realize what that means to me. What a wonderful feeling it is to know that he loves those kids as if they were his own. For this (and so many other things), let me reiterate...
Luckiest. Girl. In. The. World!
* My middle daughter had her first session with a new therapist this past week. She's been having a great deal of stress lately. Struggling a bit with school. Primarily with grades, but also with some boys who have been making her feel uncomfortable about her body. My 15 year old is quite buxom. Far more than her older sister or I, in fact. And high school boys, if you can believe it, put on impromptu contests to guess her bra size, or make remarks that embarass her, or hit on her...alot. And she knows that these are guys that have no interest in her other than the conquest. I'll give her this much, she's pretty smart. I wish this stuff didn't bother her so much, but I've never been in that position myself, so I'm not sure how I'd feel if it were me.
The other big stresser in her life right now is her dad. She and her older sister have asked me to make changes to the visitation schedule. Changes that would have them here full time (can you say 'hooray' with me?) and visiting their dad every other weekend (which is pissing him off big time). My older girls are of the age that they can pretty much make their own decision on the matter. They've been kind to him about it. The change wanted as much because they are just plain tired of packing and moving every two weeks, as they are of his anger management problems. Irrational outbursts and the verbal and emotional abuse and intimidation that have gotten better over the last year, but haven't stopped. And issues with respecting them, and their privacy, and mutual trust.
In any event, my #2 kid went for her first session last week. Her dad took her. And sat in on the session. While explaining the things stressing her, my daughter told the counselor (and her dad) that it hurt her feelings and that she was angry that he was opting to fight them on this. And when she looked him in the face and asked him why he was putting her through this, making the stress that was causing her to need a therapist, his response was that he loved her and wanted to spend more time with her. All about him. Doesn't want to lose the control or admit that he has problems or is, in any way, less of a parent than I am. Hey, don't want to think about the kids and what's best for them, huh? What a guy.
The next few months should be pretty painful for all of us, as he insists he is going to fight them on it. He knows this is coming and didn't even respect them enough to talk to them at all about it over the last two weeks while they were all together. Their feelings and opinions, obviously, mean so little to him that it wasn't worth the effort. But, I may need to subpoena the counselor. I can't believe my ex doesn't see the damage (both to the girls emotional health, but also to his long-term relationship with them) and that he is so blithe to it that he flaunts it in public with such disregard.
* Do you know the Debbie Reynolds' "Tammy" movies from the 1960's? Probably not. They're pretty stinky. But my mom loved them and that's where she got my name. In addition to the movies, there is also a theme song. Which is also pretty stinky, but I can't help it, whenever I hear it, I have to sing along. My girls mentioned to me last night that their dad has burned a mix cd that has the song on it. And that he and my youngest daughter sing along to it in the car. And that, in fact, his new girlfriend does, too. Sorry. That just freaks me out a little. Almost as much as him dating a girl named Tammy a few months ago.
Okay, off to the kitchen for me. Another fleeting Sunday, indeed!
posted by SuperWife | 9:56 AM
1 Comments:
T-
Thanks for the additional online shopping tips. I love L.L. Bean too--I haven't shopped there in a while. But now I am inspired to go back and take a look. I am all over sites with free shipping.
And your stories of your ex-BIL are incredible.
Thanks for the comments.
L.C.
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