Cupid's Little Helper

Just because I want all of you to have a very Happy Valentines Day (since I'm destined to do the same) fellas, I've gone to exhaustive lengths to come up with some information that should make this year's festivities memorable for you and the one you love. Now, you don't want to wait until the last minute, so avoid the rush and be the first on your block to keep up with the Joneses and all that other marketing hoo-hah.

I found this sexy name decoder site today. Don't know if I agree with what came up for my name, but given the impending holiday, I thought it was at least seasonal. So, I'm passing it along. Don't even act like you won't try it. You know you will.


Bad Cupid has a variety of e-valentines for your ex (or your current) significant other. One of my personal favorites is as follows:

roses are red
they come by the trainful
I hope your death
is slow and painful.

But be careful. Choosing from the wrong list could prove disastrous and/or expensive.



What's Valentines without some tradition? Gotta get some candy for your sweetheart, right? And it doesn't have to be chocolates, you know. How about a gummy heart? Because, after all, tradition doesn't have to be blase'...just customary.

So, while we're getting seasonal, I thought I'd share a few other goodies with you. No additional cost, of course. Just because I like you! Law & Order SVU Valentines. These are two of my favorites. Which one is creepier? You be the judge.

You say you don't have a Valentine? Mary is waiting for you now. But don't keep her waiting. She's not a woman who deals well with life's little inconveniences...

And you should probably remember a gift for your sweetheart. They advertise that diamonds are forever. Heh. You want something that says I love you? Something that says forever? I say permanent ink drilled into flesh is the answer. A tattoo professing your adoration is a sure way to show her you mean it when you say it. Just ask Billy Bob and Angelina.

Okay now. You have some work to do. I wish I could share my Valentines surprises with you, but with Highlander it's hard enough to keep secrets. I don't need to go blurting them out here. Have a happy one.