The Oral Report

Standing up in front of the class was never so much fun!

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Location: River City, United States

The rantings and ravings of a mom of three wonderful girls as she finds new love while working like a dog and shaking her fist at the system. You know. Pretty much like everybody else.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Gentlemen, Start Your (search) Engines

Yeah, okay, so that blog title made you groan. If it makes you feel better, I groaned, too. But, I wanted to use it anyway. To illustrate that, sometimes, I'm easily amused.

I wanted to share something I found funny this morning. While looking over information at my web tracker/counter, I found some interesting searches that led people to my site. With a name like "The Oral Report", I'd accepted, long ago, that I might get a few disappointed visitors in search of something they aren't likely to find here. But check out these search combinations that brought people to The Oral Report.

* pantyhose + office

* dress tucked (I had no idea there was a fetish to be had here, or that I was freaky.)

* older neighbor taught me oral sex

* father + kids + divorce

* If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college. (I've gotten numerous hits to this since I posted that Lewis Black thing. In fact, it hits every day. I'd imagine me reposting the line is not gonna help reduce that. But, I will say that I've gotten a few notes from folks that they were glad I posted the entire piece by Black. So, they may not have been terribly disappointed by the search results.)

* raising sixteen children

* chocolate bunnies + conversation + cartoon

* oral + sixteen

* Orlando Bloom (or John Travolta or Demi Moore or Holly Hunter)...I guess that's what I get for listing celeb names!

* Ventilator + wheelchair

* Sgt. Santos Cardona

* How long do you cook duggar oatmeal cookies? (I have no idea what this is.)

* Meaning of Oral Report (and many other variations including "oral report kids", "oral report instructions", "oral report guidelines", and so on and so on)

* eating chocolate to get through the day (okay, I like chocolate as much as the next guy, but this sooooo isn't me)

* Chemical burns from Ben gay (See!! I'm not the only one!!)

* Puzzle postcards

* Hanging Vinyl Records

* Mel Ignatow

* Micro Preemies

* Pike County Kentucky politics

* wild animal links

* recovering from catholic indoctrination (I like that one!)

I suppose that's a good one to end on. Now, I realize that I'm pretty new to this game and that the more I blog, the odder the search criteria leading to my blog will become. But, some of these had me scratching my head, while some had me stifling a giggle. Have you guys ever been curious enough to check into this? What are some of the more unusual searches to your blogs?


Anonymous L.C. said...

Oh you've found of my favorite hobbies--reading through my blog reports and laughing at the search criteria! I have some funny ones too, but yours are definitely funnier!

4/25/2006 12:23 PM  
Blogger FindingHeart said...

That is really one of the main reasons I set up a tracker on my page. What are people thinking of when they find me? Got to admit, I saw a link to your page and almost didn't go there thinking it was another adult page wanting to sell viagra. LOL! Glad I clicked in anyway.

Keep up the writing! Peace.

4/25/2006 3:33 PM  
Blogger Carmichael said...

those links are too funny! what a hoot! pantyhose? oral sex? burns from ben gay? catholic indoctrination?!
i would almost be afraid to see what had led people to mine.
how do you do one of those trackers? what else does it tell you? does it tell you who has visited your page?
i answered your comment on my page, too. stay warm!

4/25/2006 7:20 PM  
Blogger SuperFiancee said...

Carmichael -

There are different kinds of trackers and they will tell you different kinds of things. If you google for "website trackers" you'll be overwhelmed.

Finding Heart -

LOL! Well, I suppose I've probably run off alot of folks with the name.

LC -

Like I had time for ANOTHER hobby. Oh wait. A hobby probably applies better there. Yeah, the funny searches keep on coming. And I am pretty easily amused sometimes.

4/26/2006 5:49 AM  

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